Can a Prenuptial Reveal Narcissism or Coercive Control? | TX

 Posted on September 30, 2024 in Prenuptial / Postnuptial Agreements

A celebrity told New York Magazine in 2002, "I always wanted to have a prenup that said, ‘You will love me forever, and if you don’t, you die!’" Unfortunately, if you asked a hundred narcissists what they wish their prenuptial agreement could say, it is likely all one hundred would agree with this sentiment. Equally unfortunate is that most people who are in love and looking forward to marriage may not see the narcissistic or controlling tendencies of their future spouse until the prenup is signed and the wedding is over.

As an example, 25-year-old Jill is in the middle of wedding planning for the big event, which is only three days away. Amidst caterers, florists, and dress fittings, her fiancé calls her to say she needs to meet him at his lawyer’s office because his lawyer insists on a prenup to protect his family’s business. Jill hurries over, flustered yet full of love and excitement for her future with Todd.

As she flips through the voluminous document, Jill briefly wonders whether she should have consulted her own attorney. Todd reassures her that it is "just a formality." As the party paying for the prenup, Todd receives a certified copy of the recording in which Jill states she is signing the prenup of her own free will and a copy of the agreement. Jill receives nothing.

Years later, when Jill files for divorce after years of being controlled and deceived by her narcissistic spouse, she feels sick when she realizes that the document she signed before the wedding leaves her with virtually nothing—no marital assets, no home, no vehicle, and minimal spousal support for only a year. Speaking to a knowledgeable Fort Worth, TX prenuptial agreement lawyer from The Law Office of J. Kevin Clark P.C. is essential before you sign a prenuptial agreement that could come back to haunt you.   

Coercive Control vs. Narcissism  

Coercive control occurs when one partner deliberately dominates the other and can include strategies such as isolation, manipulation, intimidation, sexual coercion, and even physical violence. Coercive control may be more difficult to recognize than narcissism, as many abusive people are charming and kind in public. A prenuptial agreement can reinforce the domination they exhibit at home. Narcissistic Personality Disorder has the following symptoms:

• Lack of empathy for others

• Arrogance

• A constant need for praise and admiration

• Superiority

• An inflated sense of self-importance

• Preoccupation with beauty, success, and power

• A sense of entitlement

• An inability to accept criticism

• Always blaming others

A narcissist can also exhibit controlling behaviors, but a person guilty of coercive control will usually not have the additional narcissistic qualities. When emotional or physical force or violence is used to control another person, it reaches the level of a criminal offense. The narcissist’s behavior is rarely criminal but can adversely affect the lives of those who love them. Narcissists are more likely to engage in "covert" emotional abuse but can also engage in clear emotional and physical abuse, particularly after a separation or divorce.

If you feel uncomfortable when your spouse-to-be asks you to sign a prenuptial agreement, you likely have a reason for those feelings. You must always listen to your gut in this type of situation, as a narcissist or a person exhibiting coercive control has one objective – getting you to sign an agreement that is good for him or her and bad for you. After spending years with a narcissist, your prenuptial agreement may be the least of your worries, but it is always worth taking the extra time to have an attorney protect your interests when a prenuptial agreement is requested.

Contact a Fort Worth, TX Premarital Agreement Lawyer

Make sure you and your spouse-to-be have discussed whether you want or need a prenuptial agreement long before the wedding date so you are not blindsided. While a prenuptial agreement can have many benefits, speak to a knowledgeable Fort Worth, TX prenuptial agreement attorney from The Law Office of J. Kevin Clark P.C. before signing. Attorney J. Kevin Clark is skilled in dealing with narcissistic spouses, is a member of the Texas Bar Foundation and the Tarrant County Bar Association, and is experienced in complex property disputes. Call 817-348-6723 to schedule your free consultation.